so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
