we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
