Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
