you guys were way drunker than both of me
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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