As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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