you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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