great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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