goodnight i made you a song goodbye
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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