I think I died a long time ago.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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