You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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