yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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