So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
im holly from the hills drunk
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
