The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
