I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
