last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
My vagina is officially offended.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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