I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
