i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
