i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
