well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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