why didn't you poke me back
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I don't deserve a penis
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
