I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
