I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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