I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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