I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
