absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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