At least make sure they are 18
Why
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
