Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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