brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
