I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
