She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Randomize
