They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
