yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
