i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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