i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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