Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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