I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Dicks are not precious.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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