Sponge bath it is.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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