Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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