it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize