I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
