on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
