oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
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