He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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