put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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