Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
