who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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