White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize