I just saw a hot homeless man
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
