Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
