He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
